you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.