The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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