we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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