I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
How's work?
Spinning.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Randomize
