oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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