I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
how do flat chested girls get laid?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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