She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
