I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Green mimosas i think yes
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
