But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
