They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
