Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
