I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Randomize