i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize