i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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