we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I need a burrito and a hug.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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