hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize