apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
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aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
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Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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