this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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