I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
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