Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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