I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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