The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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