i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
