Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
