Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
