I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize
