btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize