I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize