I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
what day is it and did you see me today?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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