dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
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