Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize