she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
