omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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