I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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