i jhust puked up my retainher.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
You made out with two different species that night
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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