I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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