hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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