We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
