Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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