Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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