He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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