Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
