My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
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I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
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things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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