Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Randomize
