You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize