Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
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