The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
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