Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
