508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
