I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize